Full Circle



Time to blog

Well.. seeing as everyone is getting into the "magical" Christmas spirit, I think it's time for the cynic (me) to work some magic of her own. I'll take this opportunity to point out some of the negative things about Christmas.. which I find rather significant in contrast to the positive parts of Christmas.
Firstly, I dont think that half of the people who celebrate Christmas have a right to. CHRISTmas (Christ's mas) is about the birth of Christ (or so we are told). Most people are not Catholic or don't even believe in Christ. So what do they do? They stick an X in front of mas and call it a national holiday! Don't get me wrong, I don't believe in any of that brainwashing bible bullcrap, I'm just making a point here. Look at the Jews. Now they know how to do it right. They make up their own damn holiday, instead of Christmas, which actually relates to their own beliefs, not their greed for material possessions. I applaud them.
And who the hell made up Santa Claus? Some old fat guy who sneaks into the houses of children after watching them while they sleep... sounds a bit pedefilic to me. And what for? All a big scam for parents to trick their children into being good? No no no, that, my friends, is the true scam. I'm sure you have heard all about how Santa is a product of commercialism, scamming consumers into purchasing extravagant gifts for each other.. well.. have you ever really thought about it? Why the hell should two people spend the exact same amount of money on each other, only to end up with some piece of shit present they would normally mistake for dog puke? It's a waste of time, money, and effort. And what's worse, they have to keep the pricey turd of excriment and pretend to like it so as not to hurt the other person's feelings.. which brings me to my next point.
Present Syndrome: we all have experienced and dreaded this emotional gift-giving phenomonon. "What the fuck is present syndrome?" you ask? I answer: You know when you get a present, and its all akward because if you dont like it, you have to act like you do like it (Wow.. a usless piece of shit.. just what I always wanted). If you do like it, it seems utterly fake when you tell them you like it (This is great! I love it! Please don't think I'm faking it! I'm so shocked that you are capable of picking out something more useful than an ass-hair)... So one way or another.. the whole situation is so fake and akward... Everyone acting all happy and shit just to make the other person happy.. meanwhile the other person is just acting happy because they don't want the other person to think that they think they thought they think he thought she thought I thought you thought they thought he thinks the first person is a fucking dipshit who doesn't know a good gift from a coughed up hairball. Way too complicated. And the worst part of it all is that, through the entire ordeal, both people realize the fact that both are being fake, and both know that the other person knows they are being fake. "How, oh Great One, do we avoid this hassel?" you ask? I answer: it may seem 'cold', but do like I do, agree not to buy presents but to save your money for something useful.. say, for instance... alcohol. Yes... alcohol.. the one gift that can't go wrong.. mmm.

Okay, well.. im getting tired of blogging... to be continued


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